..and then I cried a puddle of happy tears.

My beautiful new necklace.

Up until now the whole veto-ing Valentines Day has worked really well for me. Partly because I like to push against mainstream practises cos it’s fun, and partly because I’m married to an incredible autistic man who doesn’t really *get* the concept of romance or the actual point of celebrating Valentine’s Day at all, really.  He is also pretty hopeless with remembering dates unless I write it on the whiteboard or schedule it into our shared digital calendar with reminders.

We’ve been together almost 11 years now and after about the 3rd year running of not receiving any card or gift for this silly day I kind of gave up on the whole thing and dropped expectations totally. But that’s been okay.  Because I am blessed enough to be married to a man who shows me he loves me in small ways, constantly. There hasn’t needed to be a big show or grand gesture because we are still very much in love and endeavour to make this known to each other all the time. Romance to me is in the way he folds laundry every night, does the groceries every week. Romance is the way he makes me my delicious coffee every single morning and the way he gets up at 5am with our little dawn-treader, no complaints. It’s the simple, random “I love you” messages he sends me throughout the day. It’s the way he picks up chocolate truffles for me at Aldi because he knows they’re my favourite and he loves me even though they make my arse bigger.

Anyway, I digress.

Today is just another ordinary day. Even though it’s Valentines Day. Except today it actually isn’t. Because a few days ago, whilst out op-shopping (one of my favourite things to do) I saw a beautiful black pearl choker and I sent him a photo of it and then thought nothing else of it.

Last night after we wrangled our four feisty girls into bed, we came out and sat next to each other on our couch and Cj presented me with a gift he had wrapped, and a card. A gift. And a card. Seriously!


Inside the card, it reads: “Dear Wife, Happy Valentines Day. I’m not good at remembering sentimental stuff. I’m sorry because I know it actually means things to you. I love you. I love you more as we grow together. You complete me & make me feel whole. Love Cj.”

So what was in the gift? Well I’ll tell you. Yesterday afternoon Cj text me to tell me he was running late because he had a meeting with his boss. Righteo, I thought. Whatever, he’ll still be home sooner than he normally would as he was on an early shift this week. Turns out he wasn’t at a meeting at all. He was at the op-shop, where he was showing the grannies who volunteer there the photo I had sent him of the necklace. That necklace was inside the wrapping, along with a box of my favourite chocolates (Alter-Eco salted caramel, incase you’re wondering) and there was a card, with butterflies in it. I don’t think it could be more perfect.

Yeah, I cried. I cried happy tears. Because I was so touched and it was all so thoughtful. And so unexpected.

I really fucking love that man.

Happy Bullshit Love Day, everyone. I hope you embrace the unexpected.


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