I write a lot about my incredible family because they pretty much take up most of my life, and that’s okay. But today I thought I’d do something different and blog about me. Because I’m pretty awesome too, but I guess a lot of my individual personality gets somewhat lost in my blog posts about autism, because I’m not actually autistic myself. So anyway, here’s a snapshot.
Making: Plans to yoga, menu-planning for this week’s dinners, gluten-free granola.
Cooking: So. Much. Food. Six months ago I’d go so far as to say I loved cooking but now it’s more like: WHAT? They have to eat AGAIN?! Always with the food prep: buying (OK Cj does that, but still), washing, prepping, cooking… ughhhh.
Drinking: Cider. Apple & cinnamon tea, cold. Bulletproof coffee every morning. Lots and lots of water.
Reading: Living Dangerously.
Wanting: More art supplies, more books, new clothes that aren’t stretched and threadbare.
Looking forward to: Speaking at the Passage To Motherhood Conference this year (I’m doing a talk on breastfeeding after sexual abuse) and hopefully going away for a few nights with Cj solo for the first time since we became parents for my 30th in July. Also taking Raralilyo to the ballet for her birthday soon. Oh and Mexican for Cj’s birthday next weekend.
Considering: How many toys I can get away with donating so I don’t have to keep picking them up off the fucking floor.
Harvesting: My goals and intentions.
Wishing: We could afford new bunk beds for the girls NOW so I can finally get Beans out of our room and weaned completely (she’s down to 1 feed now).
Enjoying: Making time to hang out in nature. We live on the Sunshine Coast and are surrounded daily in beauty. I kinda think of nature as my own version of “God”, for what it’s worth, because even though I was raised Catholic I think the whole thing is a load of bollocks.
Waiting: For my next study semester to go back soon. I’m doing 3 subjects this semester and I’m simultaneously gleeful in anticipation and shitting my pants in apprehension.
Liking: The fact that I am in the final year of having a toddler home with me full-time… EVER.
Wondering: If I have the guts to apply as a model for a Body Painting Festival in a few months.
Loving: Hanging out with women.
Pondering: Whether we should sell the cot & old beds, or just donate them.
Listening to: Florence & the machine, Ed Sheeran & The Goo Goo Dolls, always.
Deciding: Not to buy into narcissistic behaviour. Breathe. Let go. It’s not about me it’s about them.
Buying: New undies. Thunderpants are the best!
Watching: Will & Grace re-runs.
Hoping: Cj remembers to fill out all the paperwork tonight.
Marvelling: At all the fucking laundry (which I won’t be folding).
Cringing: At the ever-evolving ignorance of small-minded dipshits.
Needing: New vegan nail varnish.
Learning: That I matter, and I cannot give on an empty cup.
Questioning: What stuff we could leave behind if we packed up and moved away tomorrow.
Smelling: Lemon myrtle in the diffuser.
Wearing: No pants because it’s too hot.
Noticing: That Autumn is coming, my favourite season (maybe that’s why 3 of my four babies were born then hey?). I love the cooler change and I adore jean-and-boot weather.
Thinking: That I’m excited to find out who I am as I enter this next phase in my life, knowing there will be no more babies and almost over the shitty toddler stage (once we get through threenager-hood.)
Knowing: That her stuff isn’t my stuff.
Admiring: People who make time to look after their own needs despite the chaos going on around them. Getting: Some immune system building remedies ready. All the garlic.
Bookmarking: HIIT workouts, GF chocolate cake recipes and books I want.
Closing: Off the guilt and internal “I am not worthy” internal dialogue.
Feeling: Like I’m looking forward to bedtime.
Celebrating: That today wasn’t shit.
Embracing: The way I feel after I do scary stuff.